Would you ever pose naked in the name of art?

I've just read this article by Louise Schwartzkoff in today's Sydney Morning Herald and I can't help but wonder whether I would in fact be gutsy enough to strip down in art's name.

I imagine it would be so liberating to lose your inhibitions and to feel comfortable enough in your own skin that you would allow perfect strangers to sketch you. Of course the context of artistic nude sketching makes it proverbially 'easier to swallow'. If, for argument's sake, I was paid money to let a few men look at me in the buff that i'd found on the street it would be bordering on sex work and they'd certainly be called pervs. But how is it that, in a room with a few easels and some pastels or charcoals, all is forgiven?



Maybe give me a few years - and about a billion gym sessions so that I'm ridiculously toned - and I think I'd be happy to be a nude model (for artistic purposes of course). Because, let's face it, if you're comfortable enough in your own skin to let others see you bare, without any of the trappings that come with modern society - clothing, make-up, coiffed hair and excessive jewellery - then that is liberation that money can't buy. That is confidence that only comes with feeling at ease in one's own skin.

Happy families.

I'm feeling pretty annoyed at the moment because i've had a sizable argument with my parents, as my mother put it, "you've created a tsunami through this house tonight." Exaggeration? It's quite possible. Given that my family has spent the past week going to the cricket, going to Jamberoo, visiting Canberra, going Ten-Pin Bowling etc while I've been working an 8-5pm job, it might seem reasonable that I feel some slight resentment towards them when they turn around and complain that they "haven't really had much of a holiday." But no more boring you with my private family bickering.

That's what happens when one moves from living in either share accommodation - or away from home in some other capacity - to being back at home. Whether it be because one can't afford to live elsewhere, they need to save up money, or Uni ends for the year and one is faced with the dilemma of how to spend their three month Uni break, living back at home is sometimes necessary, and can be nice. For the first two, maybe three days. Then the old niggling annoyances creep their way back into home life and you quickly lose your 'how good is living with the folks' amnesia.

Sure, there are perks. It can be nice eating a meal as a family, or going kayaking all together, as we did last weekend. It is even enjoyable chilling in front of the television together. That is, if everyone can agree on watching the same program.

I have found it challenging, particularly at the age of 20, to try and conform to the expectations my parents have of me whilst living in their house. More than once they've pulled the "We could make you pay rent here you know?"

Fortunately I have my own car, but other parents I know - and up until I owned a car, I was subjected to this as well - like to announce that "I can just confiscate my car from you right now, you know?" Great. This leaves many young people with absolutely no freedom at home, and similarly little ability to escape one's stifling home environment using public transport because, let's face it, travelling on the Northern Beaches' poorly organised public transport network is never that successful.

Perhaps I should enjoy what is left of living at home while it lasts, after all, in a few years' time (and hopefully after I finish university at the end of this year), I'll be able to travel, gain employment, move out for good, and look fondly back on the years I had growing up in my family house. But until then, I suppose it's a matter of putting up with the grievances of living in the parents' house, and bite my tongue as much as possible, in order to avoid creating ripples, or "tsunamis" as my Mum so subtly puts it.

Bear Grylls...

Confession time... I have a major crush on Bear Grylls. I think it's the whole 'rugged cave man' thing he has going on, or maybe it's just that, on an anthropological level, I know he would be able to keep me safe if I was stranded in a Mexican desert or caught on a glacier in the French Alps. But wow... anyone who willingly puts himself into the situations he does, and comes out of them without the slightest scratch is ridiculously attractive - so much determination.

He's also pretty nice to look at. Yes?



Oh, and did I mention he served in the United Kingdom Special Forces and as an SAS soldier?

Unfortunately he is married and has kids, so no real potential future husband material there, but that's not to say I don't love watching his TV program! So Bear, if (and of course I really hope this is not the case) it doesn't work out for you with your wife, i'd be willing to consider you.

Luk Chai.

Today my mum, sister and I all went to Taronga Zoo. We had such a great day - the animals were spectacular and the seal show was also a definite highlight. If you get the opportunity to look at Luk Chai, Australia's first elephant born in captivity, I would certainly recommend it. Luk Chai is now 288kg and he has made me more certain than ever that I really really really would love a tattoo of an elephant on my foot. Here are the photos from our day.

What a conundrum!

I went out for drinks with my friend Claire and her two sisters and had such a fun time in Manly. We started off at Shark Bar and had a drink - I ordered my Vodka, Lime, Soda and realised in the first gulp i'd been given something that resembled peach schnapps and soda (bleugh) so I quickly had that swapped by a bar tender, who proceeded to drink what I handed back to him. Unfortunately 28-year-old Mollie, who was with us on our night out, forgot to bring her ID, but despite her 28-years, she was not allowed in, and had to catch a bus back to Brookvale to get her ID before her night could properly commence.

Lucy, Claire and I then moved to the Steyne after a quick by-pass through Henry Afrikas (not so impressive). Second drinks issue - the bar tender refused to accept Lucy's money, because it had a slight tear in it - was quickly resolved after the bar tender had five girls ask to speak to the manager because the money was in fact still legal tender.

We were soon joined by a group of four Norwegian guys, one of which was really pretty hot. We began talking with them and I was soon pretty impressed by him. A 30-year-old Civil Engineer who speaks three languages (German, Norwegian and English), plays lots of sport (he surfs, wakeboards, skis, snowboards etc), and has travelled to all but one continent (with highlights being that he was invited into mud huts in Nigeria and partying at Carnivale in Rio De Janeiro). So I was really quite interested after i'd sussed all this out.

Anyhow, we left them and went and danced, and at 3ish in the morning, decided we needed a rest, so Claire and I went and sat back down at a table, we were still at the Steyne at this time. Claire and I started to look through the crowd, checking out which guys were hot and which were not. I began telling her how I still thought the Norwegian guy was my favourite when he came up to me and asked if there was "any room for a Norwegian" to sit next to me. Of course I shifted over, and we began chatting once again.

We talked for about half an hour. I soon discovered he was leaving two days later... so there was almost no chance for us to get to know each other after our night. He kept looking straight into my eyes and sat quite close to me, being genuinely sweet and not at all slimy. He spoke English very well, albeit slightly formally. The other girls then were ready to go, and after he gave me three bands to listen to after we discussed our favourite music, I left him at the table.

What I regret is that we didn't exchange numbers. He had tried sussing out whether I had a boyfriend, and told me he thought i would make a great journalist, because "how do I say this in English... you have a winning personality." For some unknown reason, at the time, I figured if it was meant to be, fate would intervene and we would meet again. Although, given he lives in Norway, I certainly have my doubts. To add further to my problem, we never properly ascertained what each other's names where... although we chatted so easily, it never occurred to us to really find out our names.

Claire said that, when we left, the Norwegian looked really disappointed... perhaps he was just trying to pick me up for a one-night-stand, but he didn't seem like that kind of guy. Not really sure what to do now. I knew, after I met him, that he was really special - I've practically never met anyone I have so quickly thought I would like to be with. But c'est la vie. If you know of a Norwegian 30-year-old Civil Engineer who has recently travelled to Australia and has stayed in Manly, please let me know - it might save fate from intervening.

Christmas cheer

Today I made some incredible (if I do say so myself) Christmas mince pies that got the approval of those who tried them.
The pastry is a little fiddly, but once you've mastered that, they're a cinch to make.
All you need to do is follow this recipe:

Preparation Time 30 minutes
Cooking Time 35 minutes
Makes 40

Ingredients
2 tbs brown sugar
2 tbs brandy
1 small Granny Smith apple, peeled, cored, coarsely grated
85g raisins, coarsely chopped
85g currants
85g sultanas
60g glace cherries, coarsely chopped
115g (1/3 cup) breakfast marmalade
1/4 tsp mixed spice
600g (4 cups) plain flour
80g (1/2 cup) icing sugar mixture
300g chilled butter, chopped
2 egg yolks
4-5 tbs water
White sugar, to sprinkle
Icing sugar, to dust
Method
Combine the brown sugar, brandy, apple, raisins, currants, sultanas, cherries, marmalade and mixed spice in a bowl. Set aside, covered, stirring occasionally, for 1-2 days to macerate.
Place the flour, icing sugar and butter in the bowl of a food processor and process until it resembles fine breadcrumbs. Add the egg yolks and water, and process until the dough just comes together.
Turn the dough onto a lightly floured surface and knead until smooth.
Preheat oven to 180°C. Roll out the pastry between 2 sheets of non-stick baking paper until 3mm thick. Use a round 6.5cm-diameter pastry cutter to cut 40 discs from the pastry. Line forty 30ml (1 1/2-tablespoon) capacity patty pans with the discs. Use a fork to prick the bases.
Re-roll leftover pastry between 2 sheets of non-stick baking paper until 3mm thick. Use a round 5cm-diameter pastry cutter to cut 40 discs from the pastry. Spoon 1 heaped teaspoon of fruit mixture into each pastry case. Top with pastry discs. Press edges to seal. Sprinkle with white sugar. Bake for 30-35 minutes. Set aside for 15 minutes to cool before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.
Dust the pies with icing sugar to serve.
Notes & tips
Freezing tip: At the end of step 5, layer the fruit mince pies between sheets of freezerproof paper in an airtight container. Label, date and freeze for up to six months. Thaw overnight at room temperature.
Allow two days macerating and cooling time.
Taste.com.au has everything you need for Christmas including Christmas gift ideas like truffles and rum balls, Christmas menu plans and handy video how to tips.

I got this recipe from Good Taste magazine in 2007 - worth keeping!!

Envisioning your future

In following with the title of my blog, Miss Ambitious, I thought I'd discuss goal-setting, and the best way to achieve all that you envisage for your future. Vision boards are scorned at because of their association with 'The Secret' and its cult following. But here is a clip that explains them and how they work.

I think there is great value in being able to pen your ambitions and goals on paper - it suddenly makes them seem so much more real, it sets in concrete where you see yourself in the future, and forces you to have integrity to yourself in doing all that you can to achieve your goals. You are able to visualise your future and be in control, rather than having lofty ideals of what you might maybe someday perhaps want to do sometime later.

Here are some of the things that are on my vision board:
• Sky News Scholarship/ Internship
• Earn sufficient funds to be able to travel from December 2010-2011
• Continue improving fitness and toning and maintain healthy eating
• Get a loving, funny, kind and caring boyfriend
• Gain employment with the Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade in their Communications area
• Live overseas in a professional capacity

I've used vision boards in the past - I made one in year 11 that incorporated my hopes for university, scholarships, my UAI, the car that I wanted to purchase etc. and reflecting back now, I can see that I have been able to achieve almost all (I haven't yet travelled to New York) of what I set out to achieve - hopefully vision boards will be as useful for others as they have been for me.

Manly... my fave place!

Just arrived home from Bathurst (and will be here in sunny Sydney until the end of January, 2010) and wanted to do nothing more than visit my favourite place - Manly.

So I thought I would share with you some of the photos I took while I walked around there.

I just couldn't face going out tonight, particularly after the past week (where I've had lots of late nights). It was definitely a good decision - the water at Manly was beautiful, I sat and watched the sunset, and then tottled over to Manly Wharf, just to people watch... unfortunately people don't do it that much here, but in Europe, it's a favourite past-time to sit and watch people as they walk by.

Enjoy the photos... I sneakily took the photo of the guys all Parisian-looking in their cute outfits, but despite the poor quality of that photo, I felt it necessary to show you.

Music as therapy

Today marks the final day I will be spending with one of my best friends, whom I have been so grateful to have lived with this year. This gorgeous friend will be travelling overseas for two years and, while I am extraordinarily happy for her and so proud she has been able to organise everything for her trip abroad, I will miss her terribly.

This is a very bittersweet moment for me, but I’m so grateful that I still will be living with amazing people next year.

In a situation such as this, I love to turn to certain songs to ‘pick me up’. For me, music soothes and its familiarity is comforting.
Personally, my favourite songs to listen to when I’m struggling or upset are:

• Look After You by The Fray
• It’s OK by Atomic Kitten
• The Special Two by Missy Higgins
• Fast Cars by Tracy Chapman
• Don’t Panic by Coldplay
• You Make It Real by James Morrison
• Hold Your Hands Up by Cascada
• The Last Day on Earth by Kate Miller-Heidke
• Band Aid by Pixie Lott
• Golden Ship by Gin Wigmore

Alternatively before I go out at night, I’ll listen to certain music to ‘pump me up’ or prepare me for being in a certain mood or mindset.

How does music serve to improve one’s mood? Of course there are scientific and psychological explanations for the effect music has on the individual.

According to Trajoa (2001), admittedly cited from Wikipedia, “when unpleasant melodies are played, the posterior cingulate cortex activates, which indicates a sense of conflict or emotional pain. Eisenberger goes on to say that “the right hemisphere has also been found to be correlated with emotion, which can also activate areas in the cingluate in times of emotional pain, specifically social rejection.”

Trajoa explains that this evidence, along with observations, has led many musical theorists, philosophers and neuroscientists to link emotion with tonality.

What do you enjoy listening to as a ‘pick me up’ song, or to pump you up before going out? Do you think music is able to effect your emotions?

Christmas... a time for reflection.

I always find Christmas time is the perfect time to reflect on the year that has passed. I use it as a time to be grateful - for friends, family, possessions, experiences - and this Christmas is no exception.

Last night marked the end of my first year as a boarding assistant in a boarding school in Central Western New South Wales. The school’s annual Christmas dinner was a beautiful festivity arranged by the boarding mistress and master, which they no doubt put hours of organisation into.

The dinner, put on by the dining hall, consisted of ham, turkey and pork, baked potatoes, peas and corn, along with pumpkin and gravy. Additionally a selection of sauces including apple sauce, cranberry jelly and mustards, and a Christmas pudding with custard were provided.

I thoroughly enjoyed seeing all of the girls all dressed in jumbo Christmas stockings they had cut the bottoms of, in order to be worn as boob-tube dresses and the male students dressed in collared shirts and smart trousers (a great change from their usual dinner attire of t-shirts and boardies with thongs). They had all made such an effort!

We played trivia, guess that tune, tunnel ball and a custard-eating competition, and farewelled staff that were to depart at the end of 2009 and also watched performances by both the girls and boys boarding houses.

I really appreciated the close community feel we have within our boarding environment. When the boarding parents’ children are able to run around, and are passed to students to be looked after while the boarding mistresses and masters need to organise various events etc, the true family feel of the school truly comes out.

I feel so privileged to have been able to be involved in this school community; a great change from my life on campus at university last year. I was yesterday asked whether I had preferred my year on campus, or as a boarding mistress more, and I honestly could not say. Both experiences have been incredible – experiences I could only have had while at university, they wouldn’t be possibilities in the future with a full-time job. I am so grateful I have been able to experience them when I have, and that I have made embraced these opportunities when they have arisen.

I have learned over these past two years that it is crucial to take up any opportunity that comes your way, despite the fact that it may seem scary or somewhat out of your comfort zone.

12 months ago I certainly didn’t believe I would be able to control 35 girls and to oversee their well-being and care for them on a regular basis, while earning respect from them and developing wonderful sister-sister style relationships that ensure they can approach me with their problems. Of course it is still necessary to maintain professional distance, but this experience has enabled me to develop leadership skills and friendships (with the other residents) that will last forever.

This Christmas I can be grateful for an incredible array of friends and experiences that I have gained in 2009.